You provide many arguments to why unpaid internship is bad, but not many solutions are suggested. How can words be put into action and bring fairness to unpaid interns?
I can feel the sympathy toward unpaid interns, but how can you convince me to stand up for unpaid interns and bring new solutions to the companies that exploit the unpaid interns?
Your essay is biased toward unpaid interns. Can you elaborate why corporations have continued to exploit unpaid interns and how it is widely accepted in bigger companies?
In your conclusion, it seems you are fighting for fair wages more than unpaid interns. Is there any way to steer the conversation back to your topic?
It seems like when you talk about unpaid interns and regular employees, it seems like an opportunity to use slice pie and define each group.
Your essay appeals more to sincerity, but needs more building. Can you add a bit more examples for unpaid interns and how being unpaid affects them?
Why should unpaid interns be illegal? Try asserting your views on the topic starting with your title. Using the word should does not bring certainty to your essay.
What solution could be done right now to help unpaid interns?
How did unpaid internships become popular?
Unpaid internships should be illegal. So what? Who does it affect? Is there a certain group of people being exploited? Age? Gender? Race?
You unleash your proposal too early in the paper. Use Some of the early paragraphs to establish the problems inherent in unpaid internships. You can certainly take what you already have and shift the development of the problem above what is now your opening paragraph.
The development of the proposal’s benefits needs development. The argument remains focused on the negative (problem). Remedy this issue by shifting focus to what would improve if your proposal is enacted.
Ex: Income inequality would shift to a focus on income equality. This could shift can be done with most paragraphs.
You are required to use MLA format for the paper. (author’s last name page number) (Berger 34).
The Works Cited page should be reviewed as well.