Topic: The Supreme Court should rule to make the South Asian caste system a protected category because, without explicit protection rights for them, they face constant prejudice with no consequences for the perpetrators. In the United States, discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, and national origin is prohibited under federal law. However, there is no explicit protection for individuals based on their caste. Adding caste protection to the law would ensure that those that are victims of this crime don’t have to suffer in silence. It also ensures that awareness is brought to this issue that is normally swept under the rug by most officials and higher caste individuals.
Take the essay attached below and edit it/add to it according to the below instructions.
- Make sure to include 2 different sources in the body paragrpah and counterargument.
- Include real-life examples throughout the essay.
- Include two pictures that support the paper. For example, a diagram of the caste system or dalits being discriminated against at the BAPS temple.
Format for Paper:
- Paragraph 1: Introduction: Include a real life account of someone who faced caste-based discrimination in the US as the hook. Include good background to the topic.Last sentence should be a clear thesis statement that encompasses what the paper is about.
- Paragraph 2: Body 1: Include a clear topic sentence. Put two sources in the paragraph that support the topic sentence. The sources should be introduced clearly and have good analysis after the quote. Also, connect both sources with a good transition sentence.
- Paragraph 3: Body 2: Include a clear topic sentence. Put two sources in the paragraph that support the topic sentence. The sources should be introduced clearly and have good analysis after the quote. Also, connect both sources with a good transition sentence.
- Paragraph 4: Body 3: Include a clear topic sentence. Put two sources in the paragraph that support the topic sentence. The sources should be introduced clearly and have good analysis after the quote. Also, connect both sources with a good transition sentence.
- Paragraph 5: Counter-Argument: Include a clear topic sentence that adresses the counterargument as well as the rebuttal. Put one source in the paragraph that supports the counter-argument. The second source should be the rebuttal source. The sources should be introduced clearly and have good analysis after the quote. Also, connect both sources with a good transition sentence.
- Paragraph 6: Call to Action: Encourage your audience to take action. Provide them with resources they can reach out to help this underserved community.
- Paragraph 7: Conclusion: Restate the thesis. End on a broad note.
Teacher’s Feedback: Be sure to add a visual aid like we discussed in class Thursday. I don’t feel like there is enough human connection and explanation of why your topic is important and who it effects in the introduction. Can you work on bringing in some emotional appeal and give this argument a human connectin? Also, think of ways you can strengthen the argument here. How can you change your topic sentence claims into more of controversial claims? Can you add another source and add another case of synthesis? One big issue to revise is trimming down your paragraphs. Even with snythesis, you should tighten up your lines and get rid of excessive wording.