{"id":17721,"date":"2023-04-28T16:18:31","date_gmt":"2023-04-28T16:18:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/questions\/write-a-rough-draft-of-your-introduction-paragraph-for-essay-5-technology-addiction-and-the-long-term-effects-on-teens-adolescents\/"},"modified":"2023-04-28T16:18:31","modified_gmt":"2023-04-28T16:18:31","slug":"write-a-rough-draft-of-your-introduction-paragraph-for-essay-5-technology-addiction-and-the-long-term-effects-on-teens-adolescents","status":"publish","type":"questions","link":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/questions\/write-a-rough-draft-of-your-introduction-paragraph-for-essay-5-technology-addiction-and-the-long-term-effects-on-teens-adolescents\/","title":{"rendered":"Write a rough draft of your introduction paragraph for Essay #5 &#8211; technology addiction and the long term effects on teens &#038; adolescents"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><span style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">I do need help revising the outline \/ rough draft he did. There is a bit of a back story so I was hoping if we can speak in person. i will pay now but need to explain what is needed<\/span><\/p>\n<div><span style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/p>\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">He is an athlete in college and I know he is struggling in English, yes I will it may take me a minute to pull up, be patient<\/p>\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/p>\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Write a rough draft of your introduction paragraph for Essay #5 and a rough outline of what you plan on covering in the body paragraphs.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Remember that an introduction should include:<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">An interesting opening strategy in the first sentence or two to &#8220;hook&#8221; the reader. Examples of opening strategies include:<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">An interesting quotation<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">An interesting fact<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">A question<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">A brief story or vivid description of something related to your essay<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">A few sentences of background information<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">A clear, effective thesis that identifies the topic and makes a statement that is arguable or in need of explanation<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">The outline should include:<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">A topic sentence for each paragraph you plan on writing<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">A short description (one sentence) of what the paragraph will do to develop and support the idea in the topic sentence (including which sources you will use in which paragraphs)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Rubric<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Essay 5 Introduction and Outline<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Essay 5 Introduction and Outline<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Criteria Ratings Pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">This criterion is linked to a Learning Outcome Opening Strategy<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">3 to &gt;2.7 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Excellent<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Introduction a lively opening strategy that shows creativity and thoughtfulness.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">2.7 to &gt;2.4 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Strong<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Introduction includes a clear opening strategy that shows planning and effort.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">2.4 to &gt;2.1 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Acceptable<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Introduction makes an effort at an opening strategy that could be more developed or creative.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">2.1 to &gt;1.8 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Needs Work<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Introduction does not include a clearly identifiable opening strategy.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">1.8 to &gt;0 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Keep Trying<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">The introduction&#8217;s opening is extremely underdeveloped<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">3 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">This criterion is linked to a Learning Outcome Background Information<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">3 to &gt;2.7 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Excellent<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Opening strategy is followed by background information that takes the reader&#8217;s needs into consideration.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">2.7 to &gt;2.4 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Strong<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Opening strategy is followed by sufficient background information.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">2.4 to &gt;2.1 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Acceptable<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Opening strategy is followed by some background information, or perhaps more than is necessary.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">2.1 to &gt;1.8 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Needs Work<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Background information is either minimal or excessive. The writer should seek to achieve a balance of information that will help the reader grasp the topic but save specific examples from the body paragraphs.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">1.8 to &gt;0 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Keep Trying<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">The introduction lacks background information.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">3 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">This criterion is linked to a Learning Outcome Thesis<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">4 to &gt;3.6 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Excellent<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">The introductory paragraph ends with a strong thesis that addresses the prompt directly, is specific, and provides some rational for the opinion expressed.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">3.6 to &gt;3.2 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Strong<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">The introductory paragraph ends with a good thesis that addresses the prompt, is specific, and provides some rational for the opinion expressed.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">3.2 to &gt;2.8 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Acceptable<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">The introductory paragraph ends with a thesis that addresses the prompt and expresses an opinion.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">2.8 to &gt;2.4 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Needs Work<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">The thesis may difficult to identify, may be located in an unconventional place or may not address the prompt directly enough.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">2.4 to &gt;0 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Keep Trying<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Outline is lacking a thesis statement.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">4 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">This criterion is linked to a Learning Outcome Outline<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">20 to &gt;18.0 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Excellent<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Outline includes topic sentences for several paragraphs and clear explanations of supporting points. At least three references to sources.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">18 to &gt;16.0 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Strong<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Outline includes topic sentences for several paragraphs and brief explanations of supporting points. At least two references to sources.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">16 to &gt;14.0 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Acceptable<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Outline includes topic sentences for at least two body paragraphs and minimal explanations of supporting points. At least two references to sources.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">14 to &gt;12.0 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Needs Work<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Outline includes topic sentences for several paragraphs but no explanations of supporting points. At least one reference is made to an outside source.<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">12 to &gt;0 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Keep Trying<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Outline may lack topic sentences OR reference to any sources<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">20 pts<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Total Points: 30<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"margin-top: 6px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"margin-right: 4px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\" data-test-popover-container=\"\" data-popover-opener=\"ember57433\"><span style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/span><\/div>\n<p><br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"margin-top: 6px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"margin-top: 6px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"margin-top: 6px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"margin-bottom: 4px; font-size: 14px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\" data-part-id=\"comment-45129308872195-21299643470\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\" data-intercom-target=\"conversation-stream-content-part\">\n<div style=\"padding: 12px 16px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Good annotations, Cole. The assessment portion could be stronger in your paragraphs as you discuss the authors&#8217; credentials. That would be a good thing to expand on in the actual essay.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Your bibliographic entries are not in MLA format and are missing significant information. You should review what you learned about documenting sources in English 100. You can also consult the MLA section at<br style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><a style=\"cursor: auto;\">https:\/\/owl.purdue.edu\/owl\/research_and_citation\/mla_style\/mla_formatting_and_style_guide\/mla_formatting_and_style_guide.html<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">Since this assignment isn&#8217;t due until Sunday, you&#8217;re welcome to resubmit to bring the score up.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"margin-top: 6px; font-size: 13px; line-height: 16px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"padding: 1px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><span style=\"margin-right: 4px; padding: 4px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/span><span style=\"padding: 4px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"padding-bottom: 4px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<div style=\"font-size: 14px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\" data-part-id=\"comment-45129308872195-21299660258\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\" data-intercom-target=\"conversation-stream-content-part\">\n<div style=\"padding: 12px 16px; cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<div style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">that what the teacher wrote so I can pay to revise his annotated bibliography first<\/p>\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/p>\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\"><\/p>\n<p style=\"cursor: auto; color: inherit;\">That is what he started for rough draft. Please remember that he isn&#8217;t academic all semester so I need someone to write it as if they weren&#8217;t that smart-lol!! don&#8217;t want to red flag<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<p><\/span><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I do need help revising the outline \/ rough draft he did. There is a bit of a back story so I was hoping if we can speak in person. i will pay now but need to explain what is needed He is an athlete in college and I know he is struggling in English, [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":[],"disciplines":[186],"paper_types":[],"tagged":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/questions\/17721"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/questions"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/questions"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17721"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/questions\/17721\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17721"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"disciplines","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/disciplines?post=17721"},{"taxonomy":"paper_types","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/paper_types?post=17721"},{"taxonomy":"tagged","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.goodacademic.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tagged?post=17721"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}